Somone call the Fart Doctor!!

Friday: Went to the eye doc, got a new one, she rocks. Came home, ate Taco Bell, played a little Rock Band. Chris texted me asking when I was leaving, since he said I should come up to Bloomington. Ellen was at happy hour, so I said fuggit, and wound up driving to Bloomington. Arrived at my destination shortly after 8pm, 2 hour drive FTW.



Yah. Ryan's birthday party was goin down, so I decided to pop in. My conclusions:
1) Chuck E Cheese sells beer, this is an absolute requirement to exist in my world, because:
2) THERE ARE SO MANY F'N KIDS. I mean, I realize it's a Chuck E Cheese, but I seriously felt my penis invert itself. The ultimate birth control.
3) Air hockey table is tiny, sinks are tiny, skee ball is tiny.
4) Robotic rats are very creepy when you're older than 10, as evidenced here.
5) Chuck E Cheese staff does not enjoy Chris dancing with the giant creepy rat after 4 beers, as evidenced here.

So, we closed down CeC I guess, at like 9 or something (lightweight 8 year olds, I tell ya), and headed over to some bowling alley for some bowling. Bowled a couple of games, people splintered off. Chris and I attempted to meet up with everyone at some bar I can't even remember the name of now, but regardless we failed at locating it, so we wound up at Pub II, where we drank much booze and tequila and other booze and ran into Jay Sanders. Tried to get in the middle of a fight and kick someone out of the bar who wound up working at the bar. It was awkward, but I was drunk and intimidating. He apologized. Hung out until after they closed somehow. Got a cab, went to Kappa Kabana, some horrible shitehole strip club. Cabbie (chick) was told by dispatch to just hang out there, so I invited her to come in with us. Chris ordered drinks, and proceeded to get kicked out for puking in a urinal. I yelled at bouncer (again, drunk), slammed drinks, and had the cabbie take us to the wrong hotel. Figured out where we'd decided to stay finally, crashed hard around 4:30 after wandering Schnucks for what seemed like 5 hours looking for contact solution that I left in my car, which was at PubII.

That was the longest paragraph ever.

Saturday: Woke up, ate Avanti's, drove home. Pooped, took shower, slept until 6pm. Nate & Beth came over so Nate could get his Rock Band fix. I drank a lot.

Sunday: Woke up, ate food, sat around most of the day. Wound up going to Edwardsville for Walmart run, poked around goodwill, and hit BW3 for the shittiest service ever in the history of anything. Came home, watched 3:10 to Yuma, which rocked my fucking face.

I think that's it. It's cold and icy. No me gusta.